Missed Calculations

In this monologue from the play, “Missed Calculations”, Tyler, a middle school boy, must explain to his math teacher what happened to his missing homework.

TYLER: Uh, Mrs. Jenkins, can I talk to you for a sec? It’s about the homework… No, no, I did it! I swear! But, um, my dog, Buster, he… he ate my homework. (Beat, seeing the teacher’s skepticism) No, really! It’s true!

Okay, so last night, I’m at the kitchen table, working on those math problems you gave us – the really hard ones with fractions. And I was actually getting it, you know? I had like, two pages of work done.

Then, I went to grab a snack, just for like a minute, and that’s when it happened. I come back, and there’s Buster, with the homework in his mouth! I tried to stop him, really I did! I chased him around the house, but he’s fast, and he’s just tearing my homework into pieces!

(He gestures wildly) And then he runs into the living room, and my mom was cleaning, see, and Buster, he’s terrified of the vacuum. So, he dives under the couch, still with my homework in his mouth!

(He looks pleadingly at the teacher) I finally got what was left of it. But by then, it was just… a few chewed-up pieces of paper.

(He lowers his voice, earnest) I know it sounds like the oldest excuse in the book, but I promise you, Mrs. Jenkins, it’s true. I can bring it in… well, what’s left of it. Or maybe my mom can tell you.

(He sighs, looking down) I understand if you’re mad, or if you don’t believe me. But I really did do the work. And I can do it again! Just, maybe this time I’ll lock Buster out of the room or something.

(He looks up, hopeful) So, can I… can I have a chance to redo it? I know it’s a lot to ask, but I don’t want my grade to suffer because my dog ate my homework.

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