I Spy With My Little Eye

In “I Spy With My Little Eye”, an elderly couple’s overzealous attempt at neighborhood espionage leads them into a series of misadventures as they try to unmask a suspected spy living next door.

WALTER: Margaret! I’ve cracked it, I’ve really cracked it this time! You know our neighbor, Mr. Davidson? Or at least that’s what he says his name is. But I’ve found him out, once and for all. He’s a spy, I tell you, a spy! And don’t tell me I’ve been watching too many James Bond movies. I have, but that’s not the point.

Every morning, 7:15 AM sharp, he takes out his trash. But who takes out trash at the exact same time every day? Someone with a strict schedule of espionage. And those long, mysterious phone calls in his backyard? He’s reporting to HQ! Why else would anyone talk on the phone in their garden? Why not inside?

So, here’s what I did: I set up a base. In our living room. I’ve got binoculars, notepads, the whole shebang. I know you thought I was setting up for bird watching. Well, in a way, I am – watching a very sneaky bird. A sneaky, squawky, bird sent from Russia! Or wherever he’s from.

And get this: I borrowed Tommy’s drone. Flew it right over Davidson’s yard. You should’ve seen the footage – gardening tools laid out like secret weapons, a shed that’s too clean, too orderly. No one has a clean shed. No one!

And here’s the linchpin, Margie: I caught him receiving a package. A small, nondescript package. You know what that means? Gadgets! Spy gadgets! Or… maybe it’s an Amazon package. But I’m leaning towards gadgets.

Tonight’s the big operation. I’m going full camouflage, face paint and all. Gonna crawl through the bushes, get a closer look. Margie, you’re on comms, we got walkie-talkies. We’re like those spy couples on TV, only with more arthritis and even more cocktails after we’re done.

Operation Little Bird is a go! You’re in, right, Marge?

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