In this monologue from the play, “Mistle-No” Lizzy, a young woman, is drunk at a holiday party where things aren’t going her way. The party has stopped and she’s addressing everyone.
LIZZY: Merry f’ckin’ Christmas! No, please, keep playing the music. Don’t let me stop you. Just know that this is the worst Christmas of my life. Not to be a negative Nancy, but who drank all the eggnog? Look, I… I haven’t had a good year, okay. You’d think I was on the naughty list; my student loans were supposed to be forgiven but instead they doubled, my cat died, and tonight… well, tonight was supposed to be magical. I knew you’d be here, Carl. I’m about to be cringe as f’ck, but… I wanted to meet you under the mistletoe. Ya know, the whole kiss thing? I thought we’d have a good time. But we broke the karaoke machine during “Jingle Bells”, then Paul accidentally got my Secret Santa letter confessing my love instead of you, and now I’m embarrassing myself utterly and completely in front of strangers. So I’m glad I’ll be the funny, pathetic story you tell your friends about this year. “What fun it is to laugh and sing about my terrible night!!”
Please read the “Important Note” to purchase the full ePlay below:
IMPORTANT NOTE: This is NOT an immediate digital download. This is a ~10 minute play that will be available in approx. 1-3 business days after purchase, and sent to you via email. Thank you for your patience and your support of our work.
Leave a Reply